How to Communicate with Your Man
I consider myself a master communicator, at least at this point in my life I feel as though I am pretty good at expressing myself. (probably too much... lol) Mainly because I love to talk, shoot I talk all the time. Yet, communicating in a relationship is different and it has definitely not always been easy for me. I was never quite comfortable until I fell in love and simply had to learn how to appropriately communicate. Its been a work in progress there has been much trial and error. Sometimes my boyfriends says I am still way too emotional when I "cry" like a baby over "little things" but oh well, my concerns are expressed. If I cry I care ...girls don't you agree we are only really emotional with the one who matters most. I'd rather share my feelings then bottle them up.That is how people go crazy, when they hold stuff in.
When I'm not crying and in my "mature mode", I speak my mind remembering two things; how would I like someone to express their concerns to me and secondly, how does my man like for me to communicate with him?
You really have to learn your partner and be the best communicator you can be in order to help the relationship grow. You have to let your pride down often, compromise , and pick the right place and time to say things. I'm not stifling your free flow of speech, I'm just trying to express to you the importance of THINKING BEFORE YOU SPEAK , it can make a world of difference.
You see, I've always been strategic. I have to be. I learned at an early age if you want things a certain way you have to learn people, and the way they like to be asked to do things. If you know how to say things in the right tone, at the right moment in the right way, you can get a whole lot accomplished.
That is smart. This way of thinking is even more beneficial in a relationship. People, their emotions, feelings, wants , and desires are important. You're significant other should feel as though you place their concerns over your own and if that is reciprocated and they place your concern over theirs... what a lovely relationship.
SO HERE'S MY TIPS:
After making my annoying boyfriend who acted so dramatic as I made him sit and answer an array of questions as my test dummy for this post here is what I've gathered....
1. Men hate the phrase "We need to talk." They know something about to go down when you say this phrase and whatever it is your about to bring up they think it will be BS.
2. Talk while doing an activity together. Don't make communicating a chore, make it light and fun so there is comfortably there.
3. Choose the right time to talk. If its a sensitive matter don't be selfish and try to get it something off of your chest at the wrong time..possibly ruining someones day.
4. Be polite. We all grow up differently but know the way , tone, or manner your partner likes to be spoken to and adhere to that. Love is compromise. Love is courteous. Love is caring and kind.
5. If your partner doesn't like to talk it doesn't mean they don't care, just communicate in a way they like to.
6. If your significant other doesn't like for their problems to be taken on as your own and they hate to share sensitive things, build trust. Building trust helps them open up.
7. Give space. Sometimes you don't need to talk. Maybe you can just enjoy each others company and space.
Lastly. let God lead in you in what to say and how to say. He is a God of love so think of this often in your speech. Especially think of this when you're mad.
Every relationship is different so these tips aren't rules just helpful hints I've practiced. I've seen a world of difference in my relationship. So, I hope this helps you.
Gabby