I've never been broken up with before. Normally, I end things before the guy gets the chance to end it with me. I normally see the signs my ship is sinking way before my boat is under water, so I dip before I drown. The first time it finally happened to me I was shocked. I didn't see the signs. What was I so focused on? lol. I was like wait, whoa, what?! You're ending it with me?  Do you know what I have to offer? They don't make them like me anymore, bruh. Then I went into my head and replayed everything that happened. I then got upset and thought to myself, I turned down so many men to remain focused on you. This is how you repay me?! Do you know how often I get hit on sir? Then after my angry conversation with myself, I started the sad conversation. Where did I go wrong? What did I do? Was I too saved, or was I too "worldly" for him? Was I overly confident and he couldn't handle it? Did he hate the others guy looking at me when we went out? Was I too forward or too shy, did I not say the right things? Then after all of my dramatics, I said "Lord, what's my lesson in this? Gee, another sob dating story and it comes right when I thought I had met a good one." I kept praying, "I have gone through all of the 'earthly' and 'fleshly' thoughts on why this happened to me ,and have found ZERO answers. So what does the precious Holy Spirit have to say about my mess?"

He said, "Baby, God's got it." I thought to myself, how?  I'm SO mad right now. I put myself out there and got burned again! Then he reminded me about how he put himself out there on the cross. He was the most vulnerable, the most sacrificial lover, and often times we take him for granted. He said, "My grace is sufficient for you... when you are weak then I am strong." He spoke to me about forgiveness, how we may love, give, and cherish someone and receive nothing in return. Our true reward isn't in the "human" return anyway, it's in God's repayment of our goods in this life and the next that supersedes any return a human could give. Yet, we can't get caught up in worrying about the return to our giving and not the simple act of just loving someone unconditionally. 

Yes, we all deserve to be reciprocated within relationships, but sometimes our partner will fail us. We can't get bent out of shape over flawed human beings. No one is perfect. People may not see the value in you that you see in yourself. Like our precious savior loves us despite our mess, we may have to love others beyond their mess as well. It could be numerous times too! The word says we may have to forgive 70 times 7! He isn't asking us to be anyone's doormat or their punching bag, but he does ask us to trust him to make sure we are taken care of. He will show us how to love, who should love us, and the way it should be shared between you and another person. We can not get bent out of shape over a person's negligence or poor decisions concerning how to love you. Human beings will let you down, but the father will NEVER fail you and always look out for you if you let him. He can lead that person to apologize or remove them in order to make room for the one who understands how to do it right. But it's not your job to make it happen. It's our job to trust him to make it happen :)

Mother Teresa once said, "People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered; Forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; Be kind anyway. If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies; Succeed anyway. If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; Be honest and frank anyway. What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; Build anyway. If you find serenity and happiness, They may be jealous; Be happy anyway. The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; Do good anyway. Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; Give the world the best you've got anyway. You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God; It was never between you and them anyway."

I just thought I'd share my Tuesday thoughts!:)

Here I Gab Again3 Comments